How to deal with naughty children?
Many parents suffer from the fact that their children do not obey. No matter how they fought, children are not being taken seriously and missing out on all deaf ears. More often than not, this applies to mothers, while fathers often children behave more collected and obediently, although not always. But this is sort of another topic.
So, if Your child does not listen, or rather, as if he can’t hear what you say does not accept your instructions and even threats, ignores most of your requests and instructions, and everyone does as he pleases, then most likely, it has nothing to do with bad character, genes, and such things. You just gave a weak spot in the wrong place at the wrong time. And we must begin, first and foremost, You have to follow certain rules of communication with the child so the child started to listen to you, hear you and do what you’re asking.
These rules should always be observed. However, let us clarify that we are talking about children up to 9-10 years.
Of course everything is relative and individual, but as a rule, if the child does not listen in 5-7 years – to resolve the problem in most cases is not that difficult. But, if the child is in the 11-12 and older do not respond to You, it’s a different situation. And it should be analyzed more carefully to pick up the approach to the child and to determine methods of education.
How to deal with unruly children?
As we have already said, to ensure that the children began to obey You, the parents, and to abide by any rules, we first need to start to observe the elementary rules of parenting that many parents are generally overlooked.
No sooner said than done.
“If you don’t take toys, we’re not going to walk.” How often do you tell your children this phrase, in this case in five minutes, cursing and grumbling, pick up the toys themselves, and after another five minutes, kissing and hugging their child, collect him for a walk.
Of 10 mom does 8, and the remaining two are doing the same thing, just maybe not kissing and not cursing.
And what we want from our children? Naturally, they use it.
You nevertheless develop in the child a habit to ignore your instructions, and what your threats are empty, they can’t even hear.
So the first rule is if you said something, you have to do it, as a sacred duty, not for himself, but for the sake of the child.
Every family should be the rule. Yes, it is not always convenient, but the child must learn that in life there are rules that you want, or not, but we need to perform.
These rules change with age and supplemented. So the kids learn discipline and gradually get used to the grown-up world where no rules anywhere.
You, in turn, must control that the child has complied with the rules and not keep them failure.
Speaking of rules, we mean the teaching of those skills that are necessary in the future to grow self-personality. It – work skills, and self-help skills, and cultural skills.
While we are not saying that you should, as the chief of the Gestapo, to go and see how the child performs the rules you set.
Your task is not to forget about certain rules and by teaching your child to be fully involved in this process. Moreover, preferably in the form of a game, since the main way of understanding the world a child is a game.
Don’t read long natatsii.
Many parents can lecture for hours. They explain what is bad, what is good, in a circle chasing the same thing. Remember that your child listens to you the first three minutes, and then he goes thoughts to where he is interested in.
So tell me, clearly and to the point, to match words with actions, if any, would follow.
For example, if you put the child at the table, and that instead of eating watching TV, we don’t need him long to read the notation about what is, and not “watching television”, you just have to turn it off.
Consistency in action.
In the upbringing of the child, we must remember that exceptions can be no changes in circumstances, and mood swings – it means nothing either. If you have a rule to sit at the computer for 10 minutes, then tomorrow he is not allowed to sit for 20 minutes because you have no time to deal with a child.
Or today he can cut out the pictures and tomorrow you do not want to get out, and you don’t allow him to do that.
Everything should be consistently and clearly, then the child will be the same.
It is the best means of education. You can teach your child anything, to explain to him what is wrong and what you want, but unless you yourself are an example, the baby will take from you the worst quality.
You can’t smoke, and they smoke? Don’t be surprised that the child goes and collects gobies secret from you (such examples in our practice there were not times).
Swearing swearing? What? Expect the same lexicon and the child.
Do not fulfill their promises? The child intentionally and accidentally forget about their.
Show the children the importance.
Usually, the parents show the importance of the child through his love, through words of love, through gifts and so on. It’s all well and good, but it’s not the same significance, which helps the child to grow a conscious and responsible person.
You need to contact with the child was on an equal footing. That is, it is impossible to decide something for the baby, put it before the fact, or to make something do.
You have to consult with the child, discuss with him your plans and concerns, to offer him to solve those or other problems. And always try not to force, but to convince him to do what you want, that is all to turn as if, a decision is made not by you but the child.
This approach to education will enable child to feel their worth as a person. It will encourage the child, on the one hand, to do what You need, on the other hand, to answer for their deeds and actions.
This is the main rules of communication with the child, start to follow them and observe how the child’s behavior. Do not expect that changes will occur immediately, but after a week, some changes will be noticeable and gets better and better. ADNOC if nothing changes or it’ll be harder, probably the reason it is necessary to identify individually, so it makes sense to turn to a psychologist, or you can write to our experts. They will analyze your situation and make recommendations.