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Free consulting a child psychologist. How to improve memory child?


My son Misha 5 years. Just can’t understand why he was so hard to remember. He goes to kindergarten. During his life, I always talk to him, explain, teach what a child his age, his name, address. But then the teacher told me that he knows neither the country nor the city in which he lives. I started to ask him and was shocked. My question is “Your surname, name, patronymic?” put him in a deadlock. I said and asked him to repeat. Later asked again – a dead end. Forced to repeat 10 times. Again after a time he asked, he thought. And here for 2 weeks every day morning and night I ask my question, he sometimes gets confused and did not immediately respond. I’m in shock. And what will happen in school, where the need cramming. Poems and where necessary logic, he caught on fast. But English words are difficult for him and quickly forgotten. What to do? Tell me, how to improve memory. I’m scared for school.

The answer

Christina, in 5 years the child develops shape memory, well developed short-term, situational memory, i.e. the child is able to remember for a long time only vibrant, interesting information. Kindergarten program takes into account these features – reliance on visibility, frequent repetition of the material previously covered. These requirements are applicable in the primary school. I.e. the child is well remembered his address, he needs, for example, to draw a map (or show ready map of the area), to make analogies (“our street is called Lily of the valley, why do you think?”). The ability to learn by heart, i.e., rote memorization, develops only to the senior classes. And English is also taught in primary school based on the picture (the child look at the picture and reads the word under it, etc.). There are special exercises for the development of memory (for preschool age this should be in the form of a game) – look for literature, now its enough. But be sure to consider the possibility of age child (see above) and don’t forget the General strengthening of the body (vitamins, prevention of respiratory diseases) among children physical health is directly related to mental.

Asked Katerina

Often hear parents, sending children to kindergarten, they say: “If you were offended, give back, so much so that I didn’t climb more.” Touched on this topic with other moms, and many a positive attitude towards this. Always taught not to hit, and to try to resolve the issue with words, but if you do not understand, it is possible to depart (child 3.3 years). He is not aggressive, is gone and will not communicate, but will continue to stand up for themselves, because the situations are different?

The answer

Katerina, if the child is not prone to aggression, learning to surrender is useless, even harmful (reduced self-esteem, increased levels of anxiety). Parents take the easy way, believing that to learn to fight is easier than to teach how to think, analyze their own and others ‘ actions. And it turns out that the child begins to actively defend against the “offender”, who was just walking by and tripped, accidentally nudging. From sophisticated, targeted aggression preschooler needs to protect adult (explain to children the rules of conduct, to teach adequate responses in conflict situations). When the boy grows up, he will need the ability to defend oneself, there will be useful lessons wrestling (there are non-aggressive species in which the person is protected without causing injury to others). Meantime, encourage, develop the ability to negotiate, to Express their discontent. To respond to aggressive need, but adequate. Remember that aggression breeds aggression.

Asked Elena

My son is 6 years old. My concern is that the child is extremely insecure and is determined to fail. So, for example, to requests to try to do something says that won’t be because he doesn’t get it. He absolutely does not tolerate their failures. If something does not work the first time, began to get nervous, sometimes comes to tantrums. Don’t know how to play. Even losing in a Board game can lead to hysterics. Can’t play on the team because the losing team sees as a personal failure. Any criticism perceives as an insult. Don’t understand where it come from. I always try to praise when something works out and cheer for (and not blame) when something goes wrong. For example, younger sister (she’s 8 months) try to show that the person is not able to do everything at once, it takes time and patience to learn something, but it didn’t really help. Don’t know what to do, and in front of the school with the new team and with complex tasks. A child grows up in an intact family, scandals my husband and I do not happen to live separately, grandparents sees on weekends and loves, but behaves the same. Child full term, morning sickness was 5-8 week, the first month was left-sided torticollis, jaundice, intracranial pressure.

The answer

Elena, perhaps, the boy is jealous of his sister, he lacks attention and support from Your side. Need to make a diagnosis of self-esteem, anxiety, emotional state and on the results to decide how to help the child. Therefore, the required face-to-face meeting a child psychologist with the child.

Asked Ivanna

Elijah turned 6 years old. When 1,3 he was his own father died (hanged himself). A year later I met the man we started living together, then married. Ilya remembers our wedding, Sergei perceives as a native. Last name is I and Ilya is my maiden. Recently gave birth to a second child, he of his surname. Relatives of the first husband communicate with us, but live in another country. They want the child to know about his father. I postpone discussion of this issue. How and when to tell Elijah the truth? With the advent of brother he often asks questions about his childhood, about the attitude to me and his father.

The answer

Ivanna, the view of psychologists: the child should know about their relatives, about his infancy is the key to their future self-determination, development of self-consciousness. You can start from afar that some children have biological and non-biological parents. Give examples of other families where the child is brought up “the new Pope”.

Material prepared specifically

for a children’s portal “Sun”

and published 1 April 2010