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The Greed of a child: what to do, how to wean?


Already in early childhood, the child develops the self, the image of the self. Interacting with objects, he not only learns their properties, but also their own abilities. The child develops self-awareness, a sense of ownership. As he begins to consider his things as a part of himself, the invasion of things can cause a violent reaction, which others often perceived as greed.

Today the views on the formation of the personality of the child have changed, and are no more faithful postulates that the foundations of education of the personality are laid, starting in school and for the character of a person responsible teachers, then “street”, and then parents. The child’s mind is not a program that begins to work at a certain time. The formation of character traits and the formation of the whole person takes place continuously, just at certain time intervals occur mainly those or other psychological processes. Some of them are almost invisible, while others immediately catch the eye.

Greed or a sense of ownership?

One of the peculiarities of the psyche of the child is the identification with themselves. Therefore, the behavior becomes very noticeable process of the formation of a sense of ownership, when the child says “Give me”, “Mine” and starts to defend its interests, objects and toys. Parents are trying to wean the baby from greed.

The child believes those things with which it directly interacts, their. It could be other people’s things, which the child took in game center to play. If to approach him and ask to give toys that he starts to resist and to defend their right to them.

There are times when parents insist that the child gave his toy to someone else, and he wants to do. Thus, they destroy embryos is necessary for the child’s personal qualities. After all, they inspire the kid that when he would do what he’s told, they become positively relate to him, and if not, then no one will talk or play. This kind of behavior is very dangerous. It leads to the fact that the child is devalued as a person. The child develops a sense that it’s with him only because of the fact that he makes toys, not because it’s interesting.

Very often parents say to the child that “greedy” is not good. What’s bad is that the child protects his property? Think about what awaits him in the future if he learns to do that. Such a child will grow up to be weak-willed, he will not be able to assert their rights or to protect a loved one. He will have no understanding of what is something you can give up easily, and need something to compete. Thus, a person who is not able to defend his family’s honor or native person.

When the child is forced to give a thing belonging to him, he cannot understand why he should do it. If an adult person on the street asks for your car you lend him for a week “ride”? Of course, no. Exactly the same goes child. You don’t come up with the idea to give their personal items and all. So why would you expect that from your child? You say that you have a different system of values. I wonder why the child protects these battered old toys or just lifted from the earth stones, which is around at any moment, to be enjoyed by others? It is important to understand that adult is a thing, and nothing more, but for the child it part of himself.

To be greedy or to share?

Things become expensive especially for a child, when he is experiencing stress. Old toys are at this moment “moral” support in difficult times and therefore, in such situations, you cannot force a child to share their things, even for a while.

It is unacceptable for parents to stand on the side of the “offender” and to convince the child something to share. The child needs your protection, even when he made the decision that you are not satisfied. In any case, don’t reject it. Put yourself in his place: mother instead of to defend the values and to protect the property of your child, calmly gives all others. It would be correct if you don’t show the visitors favorite toy of your child in order to avoid a stressful situation.

Of course, there are situations when parents are faced with the exact opposite behavior of others. In this case, you must show the child that “the laws of property” persist. Stand up for the child when he has someone starts taking toys or borrow without permission. This is the case when you can not say “let them handle it”. And do not waste time to explain to other parents, so grabbing other people’s stuff is bad. This will be inefficient. But the “offender” needs to explain what and how. Your child you are saying that if he wants to take someone else’s toy, he should ask politely and explain that she could not give it. This right must also be respected.

For young children parents are inviolable authority. If a child sees confirmation in the behavior of the parents of any moral attitudes, it easily takes over them. Wanting to teach a child respect for others ‘ property, note, if he has any respect for her? Now, do we develop this feeling or Vice versa eradicated, as a useless weed?

If you are still asking yourself this question: “If the child is greedy, what to do?” then rethink again the “pros” and “cons”. It may be that your child simply stands for personal property? Is it bad? Look in any dictionary of the Russian language, “property” and “greedy” there does not occur within the definition. However, if the extent of “protection” began to reach a critical point, then be patient, gently explaining and not quite angrily, slowly step by step to help him form a healthy sense of ownership.